Gay couple eat thanksgiving dinner

The Trials & Tribulations Of Being Gay On Thanksgiving


The gay Thanksgiving meme rings true for a reason. It’s that time of year again when the “gay cousin” nervously clutches their phones and tiptoes around conversations. Or maybe they have to deal with a rude relative.

Some may not be out to their families yet. This can make it difficult to share the chosen families and experiences that they’re thankful for. Others may be out and proud but are celebrating apart from their families and uncertain how to form new traditions. Thanksgiving is a holiday of cheer and warmth. Whether you’re out or closeted, you should be able to enjoy it with a loving community. Here are some great ways that you can enjoy a gay, happy Thanksgiving. This includes fun ways to come out or celebrate with friends.

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How To Come Out As Gay On Thanksgiving

If you feel comfortable enough to come out to your family and other relatives on Thanksgiving, congratulations! Coming out can be scary, but it can also be a rewarding experience that affirms your identity and helps you feel more comfortable with yourself.

Here are some tips that can make it less stressful to come out at the Thanksgiving dinner table.

Start With The Family Members You Trust Most

We all have relatives we feel closer to and whom we feel know us best. If you feel that these family members will be more receptive to the news, tell them first. They can later offer much-needed support as you come out to the rest of your family, and this positive reinforcement can help if you get stressed out.

Don’t Drink To Mask Your Emotions

It can be tempting to use drugs or alcohol as a social lubricant, but it’s actually a bad idea. Revealing your sexual and gender identity can be a big step in your life, and you need a clear mind to communicate your thoughts. These substances can cloud your judgment and easily sway you into extreme, negative reactions.

Remember That They’ll Need Time

Just as you needed time and space to explore your identity, be mindful of the fact that your family members might need these things too. They may not completely understand your journey but time may give them more perspective. Tell them about your gender and/or sexual identity, then table further discussion for another day.

Decide Whether To Make A Splash Or Be Lowkey

Sometimes, we can feel comfortable enough around our families to make our coming out a comedic, lighthearted moment at Thanksgiving dinner. Why not share the “gay cousin meme” with your family and say you relate to it this Thanksgiving or bring a “gender/sexual identity reveal” Thanksgiving dish with a special message?

Others may feel ready, but want something more toned down. A good way to come out during Thanksgiving is to wait for the moment when everyone gives thanks before eating. When it’s your turn, say something like, “I’m thankful for being gay, and for feeling loved and comfortable enough to share this with all of you.”


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Festive Ideas For A Fun Gay Or Lesbian Thanksgiving

If you’re celebrating with your chosen family instead of your blood relatives, you may not have come up with your own holiday traditions yet. Here are some ways that you can enjoy an LGBTQ Thanksgiving together with your favorite friends.

Have A Potluck Thanksgiving

It may be too cramped for your whole friend group to cook in the same kitchen for Thanksgiving, so why not reduce the pressure by having a potluck Thanksgiving instead?

You can assign dishes to friends or they can volunteer their own ideas. Food, memories, and identity are all closely intertwined, so having people prepare or bring a dish close to their hearts is a great chance to learn more about them.

Queer friends enjoying meal


Go For A Gaycation

Skip the typical Thanksgiving meal and treat yourself to a festive vacation at a gay-friendly destination!

Round up your chosen family for a trip to fun, inclusive places such as Portland, Fort Lauderdale, or Key West. These LGBT-friendly areas have great nightlife and dining spots where you can enjoy your choice of low-key or wild Thanksgiving party.

Dance your blues away, toast to the friends you’re thankful for, and make new memories!

Have A Singalong Thanksgiving Brunch

If your chosen family is the kind that loves a good song and dance, a singalong meal may be just the thing. Talk to them about your playlist choices and arrange your song list. You can even form teams for a Thanksgiving singing competition ala Pitch Perfect!

Afterward, you can all enjoy your Thanksgiving lunch or dinner together, with extra slices of pumpkin pie or for the winners!

Gay couple coooking


Celebrate Your Identity & Enjoy A Gay Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving doesn’t have to be a lonely or stressful holiday. If you’re yearning to come out but aren’t prepared for the emotional weight of it during the holidays, our helpful tips can make this process easier.

But if you’re handling the trials of celebrating Thanksgiving away from relatives, don’t worry! Check our helpful tips above to get ideas on how to form fresh, fun traditions with your chosen family. You deserve to feel grateful for the season.

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The Trials & Tribulations Of Being Gay On Thanksgiving
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