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18 Straight Guys Reveal the ‘Gayest’ Things They’ve Ever Done

Straight guys cuddling together
Ashley Corbin-Teich / Getty Images

Sometimes, “straight” guys need a little queer love, too. Thanks to AskReddit, there’s a place for them to release their secrets and share their stories with the world. We poured through hundreds of threads, and these 18 stories take the cake!

1. My friend told me he was gay … I was so surprised I nearly choked on his penis.
“My friend told me he was gay … I was so surprised I nearly choked on his penis.”

roy_cropper

2. Pissed on each other. He started it.
“Pissed on each other. He started it.”

11AWannabe

3. Full anal but made sure the balls didn’t touch.
“Full anal but made sure the balls didn’t touch.”

The_Alderman

4. Butt sex but I said no homo so it wasn’t gay.
“Butt sex but I said no homo so it wasn’t gay.”

Immortal_Azrael

5. I showed a crowd of dudes my dick for a snow cone.
“Either when I kissed a dude or the time I showed a crowd of dudes my dick for a snow cone. Both at Burning Man.”

5pt

6. In a matter of minutes we’re both jerking off on the couch next to each other.
“Jerked off with a friend.

It was in high school. I was spending the night at my friend’s house. It was a sweltering summer night, so my friend and I were in just our boxers, hanging out in his back house.

Porn somehow comes on TV (I can’t remember if he put it in a DVD or what). We’re just talking about the girls and next thing I know my friend is obviously hard and rubbing himself. I start to do it too. In a matter of minutes we’re both jerking off on the couch next to each other. He cums really fast and I immediately feel awkward. I finally end up cumming … into a sock. It was weird because we just acted like nothing happened. He turned off the porn and we started playing Mario Kart. Never talked about it again and we were friends for years.”

SchlongPrincess

Related | This Is Why I Jerk Off at the Gym

7. My mother looked out the window to check on us and saw us both dicks in the air.
“One time in high school me and a buddy were swimming in my pool and for reasons unknown my buddy floated on his back, stuck only his dick out of the water and made the jaws duh-nuh noise repeatedly. So I did the same for a good ten minutes. My mother looked out the window to check on us and saw us both dicks in the air. That was a weird conversation with her later that day.”

1quick69

8. Me and a friend one time raced to see who could jerk off faster.
“As drunk teenagers me and a friend one time raced to see who could jerk off faster. He won, I was a little weirded out that he came in like 12 seconds. Another time he held my dick while I took a piss. I was holding his too if you’re wondering.”

dBob

9. Me and a group of friends used to put porn on the TV and jerk off with each of us in different chairs in the living room.
“In middle school me and a group of friends used to put porn on the TV and jerk off with each of us in different chairs in the living room. We never really looked at each other or talked about it to much.

Sometimes you gotta run one out right?”

AC-Stark

10. He slipped money in my shorts to give me a HJ.
“Gay for pay story: Close friend in HS apparently liked me the entire time. Shouldn’t have been oblivious after the times he tried to get my girlfriend and I to be physical for him to watch.

Anyway, kept asking questions about my masturbating, for details of my dick and eventually slipped money in my shorts to give me a HJ. I laid back and accepted, with my friend eventually trying to turn it into a BJ.

Years later, we both messed around.”

YoungCosmo

11. I literally fucked my friend in a public pool when I was 10.
I literally fucked my friend in a public pool when I was 10. We were pretending to be peter and Lois from family guy for some reason. I still cringe every time I think of it. Then there was that other time, also ten, when a bunch of guys got naked at a sleepover and pretended to fuck the girls we liked, ended up humping each other as well. What a year

adidasbrazilianbooty

12. He fucked me and it was pretty good.
“Hung out with a guy I sort’ve knew through someone else. I knew he was gay. We would hang out a few times, just chatting and watching TV at his place.

At some point we went quiet and he moved closer to me. We made out for a while. Then our hands moved to each other’s crotches and so soon enough we blew each other. His dick was pretty big. It was a lot of fun to give head.

On that basis I figured, “why not?”. He fucked me and it was pretty good. After a while it started to hurt but I insisted he finished first. Gotta see it through if you’ve agreed to have a dick in your ass.

After all that was over we cuddled for a bit and watched some more TV then I went home. Saw him a few times after that with mutual friends but never hooked up again, but it never got weird. Just had some fun. I’m with a long time girlfriend now. She knows about it and is cool with it.

10/10 would recommend.”

ShowMeYourCreampies

Related | It’s Not Irresponsible to Like Bareback Sex

13. Stopped him when his penis touched my butt.
“Thought I might be gay. So I and my best friend at the time tried having sex. I went bottom. Stopped him when his penis touched my butt.”

Scutum

14. Guys give the best head, generally speaking.
“I’ve had my dick sucked by a handful of men.

Maybe I’m not totally straight, but I’m at the far, far end of the bell curve in terms of female sexual partners. I’m 37 and have been tending bar my whole adult life, so it comes with the territory.

I used to be totally open about my hetero-flexibility with the girls I dated, but one who I really liked got super freaked out about it and now I just keep my mouth shut. But I’m not ashamed at all. It’s true: Guys give the best head, generally speaking. :D”

NotRevealingGayStuff

15. We would play the boner game with the goal of achieving the fastest boner.
“Join the Marines…

Boot camp, 97 guys lined up naked, ass to balls, and then we have to run through the shower room to take our shower…

While in France, there were 6 guys to a room. Every night we would play the jerk off the game and with the goal of all of us choking the clown at the same time until we came. The winner went to sleep first.

In Korea, while waiting we decided to play gay chicken… the gay guy won.

While in a formation for a change of command ceremony, we would play the boner game with the goal of achieving the fastest boner. Once a boner was achieved we would make a clicking sound. We did this to pass the time.”

CubanDevil13

16. One time I sucked this guy’s dick in the woods.
“One time I sucked this guy’s dick in the woods. There was something just so primal about it. Two sapiens rubbing each other in the wild… no homo.”

grate_speller

17. Friend and I had heard of 69ing so we decided to try it out.
“Friend and I had heard of 69ing so we decided to try it out. Pretty fucking great. I’m straight but I’ll suck some dick every now and then.”

GrumpySarlacc

18. He used his mouth to blow air into my butthole so I could fart really loud.
“When you are a man and you have a best friend you would take a bullet for no questions asked, many questionably gay things can occur with no questions or explanation. I’m only 23 and I have had the same 2 best friends for 11 years. One of them is a dad of twins now. The one who is a dad has used his mouth to blow air into my butthole so I could fart really loud.”

DozingWoW

Related | Everything You Want to Know About Fisting

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