News

Straight Guy Talks About Life as a Gay Phone Sex Operator

By  | 

It seems like the years of the 900 numbers are gone, especially the gay ones. But there are still some out there, but not all the operators on the other end are gay or bisexual. Some are straight guys who put on quite the show for cash.

Such was the case of a straight father who opened up to Cracked about his experience, and boy was it something!

One of the main things, according to him, was not to laugh, and they went through serious training for it: “A classifieds ad labeled ‘actors/actresses wanted’ led me to a nondescript call center office back in 2000, and for my audition, the lady there handed me a piece of paper with a cartoon drawn on it,” he said. “‘Please read the following lines as best you can,’” she instructed. I looked down at the sheet and saw a Tarzan-looking character in a loincloth. I proudly read the printed line: ‘I want to eat your big banana …’ Holding back laughter would prove to be downright essential.”

Related: 5 Positions All Gay Couples Should Try

This man wasn’t the only straight guy in the office. According to him, there were countless of others. One time, he asked a veteran phone operator, who he described as a “thugged-out gentleman” how he did it, how he did all this sex talk with men. The gentleman replied, “If I’m talking to some dude, telling him I’m suckin’ on his dick or whatever? I just pretend it’s my girl telling me what she’d want to do to me, or what I want her to do to me.”

It all went down in North Miami, I might add. In between calls, operators talked tough to each other, until they’d get a call and turn into “glorious sissy boys,” purring like pussycats.

“I’m engaged to a woman now, and we have a daughter. But when you have guys getting off at the sound of your voice, it’s great on your ego, and it’s easy to lose yourself in the role,” he said. “I wouldn’t call myself bisexual. But months into the job, I found myself becoming more and more … let’s call it heteroflexible….”

Double tap if you've had a threesome! #GayLife #GayGuy #gaystagram #instagay #gay

A photo posted by Gayety (@gayety) on

“A little moaning and flirtatious giggling goes a long way. It was a goddamn ridiculous system, but these are the kinds of ass-backward things that come about when members of a mostly puritanical society decide to start making money off of each other’s orgasms.”

But it wasn’t always about sex. Sometimes callers would call in for serious help, mainly closeted teens and lonely men.

Related: How to Hit a Home Run on the First Date

“It’d be a lonely older guy, in the closet in real life and with no one else to speak to,” he explained. “Talking with him would be like going on a date with a shy girl and doing all the talking, asking a lot of questions because she won’t really open up on her own. In other cases, it would be a teenager. We’d ask if he was 18, and he’d lie and say he was …”

Not getting out of bed. 😴 #GayLife #GayGuy #gaystagram #instagay #gay

A photo posted by Gayety (@gayety) on

The establishment was dead set on protecting them from serial killers, too. His bosses repeatedly drilled into their heads that a serial killer could be targeting them at all times. Outside contact with callers or sharing real information about themselves was a big no no.

Related: 10 BJ Techniques Every Gay Guy Should Master

“The place itself had decent security, with tinted glass, bars on windows and doors, and electronic locks,” he said. “And they insisted everyone enter the building on time, even if we dilly-dallied once inside, because if we didn’t, they’d assume we were out being murdered. Or perhaps they were just asshole bosses and sticklers for punctuality, and the ‘serial killer’ thing was only an excuse. Yes, perhaps that. One time, I came in 12 minutes late. When I got there, they already had someone covering my shift, and they told me I was done there. That was that. I walked out, found a working payphone, called my mother, and told her, ‘You got your wish. They fired me.’”

Who knew being a gay phone sex operator was so intriguing! Click here to read the whole interview on Cracked.

David Artavia is an actor and writer from New York City. He loves living vicariously through his friends. Follow him on Twitter and Like his Facebook page

Follow

Follow Gayety

Get our new posts in your email every Friday!

Email Address

First Name (*)

Last Name (*)